april heat

The heat makes my head spin, the sunlight is blinding, the sudden greenness is almost overwhelming, and the entire world seems engulfed in pollen. These are the last days of Duke, the last days of a stage. I still remember the first time I saw the campus, it wasn’t all that different: unbelievably green, lush flowers blooming, beautiful gothic architecture, and the stifling heat waves. Of course, I’m different. I remember the excitement, the anticipation and the curiosity I held as I roamed the campus, getting lost and then finding my ways again. Strictly speaking, I should still feel excitement, anticipation and curiosity, and I do to some degree. But there’s also a good dose of apprehension, though tempered by optimism, about the future that I did not have before.

This anxiety, I’m sure, is just a temporary thing. The present will always have more hold upon me than past or future.

Although I still remember it used to snow in Cleveland in April.

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